People Actually Think About Me?

Last Thursday I flew to Seattle for my friend Heather’s wedding. It was a wedding I really wanted to attend because I have known Heather since I was about 9 years old and she has been a part of my life since then. Unfortunately when I went to buy my plane ticket I could not afford the tickets that were available. I had already RSVPed yes so I shot her a quick Facebook message explaining that I wouldn’t be there but hoped it was a lovely wedding. So you must be wondering how, when I said I couldn’t afford the ticket, I ended up flying up to the wedding on Thursday. Well I ended up being able to attend because my friend Heather is an amazing person who brings a lot of sunshine into people’s lives. About a week later I received a text message (from Heather) offering to give me her airline miles so I could attend. In the text she said that she had been thinking about me a lot. Two days later I had a ticket in hand and two days after that I was on my way.

I said it already but Heather is great and she brings a lot o sunshine into the world.

At the wedding reception there was a girl I did not know sitting with one of my friends who was there. I had known everyone else sitting there for a couple of years so I assumed she must be dating this friend of mine and went over to introduce myself (I’m a lot better at being a people person when I’ve had a large glass of wine and no food). I was correct. She was/is the long time girlfriend of my friend Tye (Tye was my brother’s roommate for a little while during his post college life but I have known Tye for a long time separately from my brother). She said that she knew who I was because I was Jamie’s younger sister and I look like him (I look like him). Then she said a few words that I never know how to respond you, “I’ve heard stories about you”

“Good stories?” I don’t fear those words because I want the things said about me to be nice but I also worry about living up to the hype. If someone tells me that they told a friend that I was the coolest person in the world I will panic. I can’t live up to that.

“Oh yeah.”

“Oh good because if they came from my brother it’s a real toss up.”

“No, not from your brother. From Tye.”

I have stories that involve Tye but I never really expect other people to have stories that involve me. It was a strange thing to think about.

Honestly, it’s a strange feeling when you realize that people think about you when you aren’t around. Or at least it is strange for me. I don’t really expect people to think about me when I am away or even really notice or miss me. Even the fact that about 100 people out there in the world follow this blog is difficult for me to really comprehend.

Please don’t think that this is me being down on myself because I’m really not. It is just one of those things. I don’t think about the fact that people might think about me and then, when it turns out that life outside of my immediate sphere still exists when I’m not there, it takes me by surprise. It takes me by surprise that there is a version of me that exists only in people’s memories just like I have a version of each of them .

The point is that I sometimes forget that people actually think about me but, whether it is Heather or Tye or one of the other many people I know and like, I appreciate it and I think about you too. That’s all.

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Thoughts on entering my Late 20s

I haven’t written in a while, partially because I haven’t felt like I have anything really worthwhile to say but more because I have spent most of my writing time focusing on writing a book and not blogging.

ANYWAY

Tomorrow is my 26th birthday. Yay! 26! Wait… that means… oh gosh, I’m in my late 20s. I can still sort of get away with saying I’m in my mid-twenties (for maybe another year) but lets be real 21 was five years ago. I should really have my shit together by now. In my mother’s generation most people were married by this age (there’s a stressful thought). Instead of doing that I’m limping along, trying to pay down my student loans and figure out what I want to do or be.

However, instead of being sad about all of this arbitrary nonsense, I’m going to talk about what I know now that I am at a point in my life that I should be a functioning adult.

1) What people think of me isn’t really my business.

I don’t know when I really got over caring when people gossiped about me but I really don’t care. Other people’s opinions about me aren’t really my business. Those are their business. I’m going to be who I am whether you think that’s awful or not (I try very hard not to be awful).

2) Champagne is good.

I was at the liquor store on Friday and bought two cheap bottles of champagne (a brut and a pink moscato). The store clerk asked what I was celebrating. Yeah my birthday is tomorrow but I was buying champagne because I like champagne and wanted it. I like to do things because I want to, not because those are for certain things.

Also F. Scott Fitzgerald talks all the time about how great champagne is and F. Scott Fitzgerald is among my literary heroes.

3) Wear what you like, even if it makes you look like a cartoon character

I have a whole bunch of v-neck t-shirts that all look the same except they’re in different colors. Some of them are different brands but most of them are just the same brand in various colors. I almost exclusively wear these t-shirts (which kind of makes me look like a cartoon character). They’re comfortable, I think they look good on me, and they work for most occasions. The thing about wearing what makes you feel good is that makes you look good. If you own something that is comfortable and you like the way you look then you look good and therefore you should wear it.

4) There’s nothing better than wheeled desk chairs.

I love wheely, swively desk chairs. They’re great. I don’t really have much to say about them except that they’re the best.